Burma Shave

(Foreign Affairs studio version, 1977)

Licorice tattoo turned a gun metal blue
Scrawled across the shoulders of a dying town
Took the one eyed Jacks⁽²⁾ across the railroad tracks⁽³⁾
And the scar on its belly pulled a stranger passing through
He's a juvenile delinquent, never learned how to behave
But the cops'd never think to look in Burma-Shave

And the road was like a ribbon, and the moon was like a bone
He didn't seem to be like any guy she'd ever known
He kind of looked like Farley Granger⁽⁴⁾, with his hair slicked back
She says 'I'm a sucker for a fella in a cowboy hat.
How far are you going?'
Said 'Depends on what you mean'
He says 'I'm only stopping here to get some gasoline'
'I guess I'm going thataway, just as long as it's paved
And I guess you'd say I'm on my way to Burma-Shave'

And with her knees up on the glove compartment
She took out her barrettes, and her hair spilled out like rootbeer
And she popped her gum and arched her back
'Hell, Marysville⁽¹⁾ ain't nothing but a wide spot in the road
Some nights my heart pounds like thunder
Don't know why it don't explode
Cause everyone in this stinking town's got one foot in the grave
And I'd rather take my chances out in Burma-Shave'

'Presley's⁽⁵⁾ what I go by, why don't you change the stations
Count the grain elevators in the rearview mirror'
She said, 'Mister, anywhere you point this thing
It got to beat the hell out of the sting⁽⁶⁾
Of going to bed with every dream that dies here every mornin'
And so drill me a hole with a barber pole⁽⁷⁾
And I'm jumping my parole just like a fugitive tonight
Why don't you have another swig⁽⁸⁾, and pass that car if you're so brave
I wanna get there 'fore the sun comes up in Burma-Shave '

And the spider web crack and the mustang screamed
The smoke from the tires and the twisted machine
Just a nickel's worth of dreams, and every wishbone that they saved
Lie swindled from them on the way to Burma-Shave

And the sun hit the derrick and cast a bat wing shadow
Up against the car door on the shotgun side⁽⁹⁾
And when they pulled her from the wreck
You know, she still had on her shades⁽¹⁰⁾
They say that dreams are growing wild
just this side
of Burma-Shave

Written by: Tom Waits
Published by: Fifth Floor Music, Inc. (ASCAP),© 1977 & Warner Bros. Music Ltd, 1986
Official release: "Foreign Affairs", Elektra Entertainment/ WEA International Inc., 1977 &
"Bounced Checks", WEA/ Asylum Records, 1981 &
"Anthology Of Tom Waits", WEA/ Elektra, 1984 &
"Asylum Years", WEA International Inc., 1986

Burma Shave

(Live version State Theatre, Sydney/ Australia. May 2, 1979)

You know, I remember...
It rained all day the day that Elvis Presley⁽⁵⁾ died
And only a legend can make it do that!
And you know, I remember when my baby said we were through
And she was gonna walk out on me
It was Elvis Presley that talked her out of it
And he gave me my first leather jacket
And taught me how to comb my hair just right in a filling station bathroom
It was Elvis that gave you a rubber on prom night
And told you that you looked real sharp
And you know, I think he maybe just got a little tired
Of repairing all the broken hearts in the world.
And now I think maybe I understand
Why mechanics' cars never start
And why night watchmen are always sleeping on the job
And why shoeshine boys always have worn-out scooped-up shoes.
But eh... [mumbles]
A legend never dies, he just teaches you everything he knows
To give you the courage to ask her out
And I know, there's a small little town where dreams are still alive
And there's a hero on every corner
And they're all on their way to a place called
Burma-Shave

Scrawled out across the shoulders of this dying little town, see?
And every night it takes the one eyed Jacks
You know, a one eyed Jack is like a...
You got one headlight burned out on your car
It's called a one eyed Jack
You can see them from across the railroad tracks⁽³⁾
Over the scar on its belly, there came a stranger passing through
And he was a juvenile delinquent
He never learned how to behave
But the cops never think to look
When you're on your way to Burma-Shave

And the road was like a ribbon, man
Yeah, and the moon was like a bone and
He didn't seem to be like any guy that she'd ever known
He kinda looked like Farley Granger⁽⁴⁾, with his hair ssslicked back
And she said, 'Honey I've always been a sucker for a fella that wears a cowboy hat
And just how far do you think you might be going, Mister?'
He said 'Baby, that all depends on... what you mean
Cause I'm only stopping here tonight, cause I gotta get myself some gasoline'
'And I guess I'm going out thataway, at least ride as long as it's paved
And I guess you'd say I'm on my way to Burma-Shave'

And he said, 'Well, that's cool Why don't you put your knees up on the glove compartment?'
Well, she took out her barrettes, and man, her hair spilled out just like rootbeer
She popped her gum and she arched her back
She said, 'Man, this little town don't amount to nothin'
It's just a wide spot in the road
And some nights my heart pounds like thunder
I don't know why it don't explode
And everybody in this stinking town has got one foot in the grave
And I'm gonna take my chances with you tonight
On the way to Burma-Shave'

And he said, 'Eh, well you know.... okay Eh... how old are you?
Ah! That's... a problem...
Uh, where do you go to school, babe? Oh yeah? I went to Sweetwater
Oh yeah, I dropped out, y'know You know how it is. Got in trouble...
You know a guy named Eddie Alvarez? No?
Well, Presley's what they call me
Why don't you change the stations, baby?
And count the grain elevators,
Watch'em go by in he rear view mirror'

'Any way you point this thing is gonna beat the hell out of the sting!⁽⁶⁾
Cause every night I go to bed with all my dreams
I lie down and they die right here every morning
So come on, Presley, and drill me a hole with a barber pole⁽⁷⁾
Cause I'm jumping my parole like a fugitive tonight
Let's have another swig of that sweet Black Velvet
That sweet Black Velvet...
Let's pass that car!
Are you brave enough?
We can get there just before the sun comes up
You and me, on the way to Burma-Shave

Yeah... Cause I'm going crazy in this town, man
Yeah, my old man gives me nothing but shit!
I don't know, I don't care what they say
Let's get out of town tonight!'

Vrrrrrrrrooooom
Vrrrrrrrrooooom
Vrrrrrrrrooooom

Well... I was talking to my brother-in-law
He said there was a wreck out on the highway
He saw the smoke from the tires and the twisted machine
Oh, but all you've got is just a nickle's worth of dreams
And they've been swindled from you on the way to a place called Burma-Shave
You let the sun hit the derrick and cast a bat wing shadow
It's up against the car door on the shotgun side⁽⁹⁾
But you know something, baby?
I swear to God, when they pulled you from the wreck you still had on your shades
And dreams are growing wild every night
Just this side of Burma-Shave
And there's another young girl out by the highway tonight
with her thumb out
Just a few trucks going by...

Vrrrrrrrrooooom

Fish are jumpin', fish are jumpin'⁽¹⁰⁾
And the cotton is high

Written by: Tom Waits
Unofficial release: "Cold Beer On A Hot Night". KTS, 1993
(Transcribed by Ulf Berggren. Listserv Raindogs discussionlist. November, 1999)

Burma Shave

(Live version. Austin/ USA. Austin City Limits. December 5, 1978)

Aarghhh... yeahhhh... You know eh... when I was a kid... my dad had a 1957 station wagon... It was a Chevrolet. And man did I love that car. I used to go in the garage at night and turn out all the lights and roll up against it. (laughter) Huh, huh. I think that's against the law! But I remember driving all the way across country, when I was a kid in the back... I remember seeing Burma Shave signs all the way across the country along Route 66. And eh, well this is a story about a young girl. This small little town, a place called Marysville. It's up around Yuba City, Gridley, Chico, they're all the same. The names are different. It takes about... oh 23 miles and you're in the next one and they got a Foster Freeze just like they had in the one you were trying to get out of...

And eh you see there was this liquorice tattoo, he used to turn the gun metal blue
Scrawled across the shoulders of his dying little town
And he used to take the one eyed Jacks⁽²⁾ out across the railroad tracks⁽³⁾
With a scar on his belly there came a stranger passing through
And he was just a juvenile delinquent, he never learned how to behave
But the cops'd never think to look out in Burma-Shave

When the road was like a ribbon, and the moon was like a bone
He didn't seem to be like any guy she'd ever known
He kind of looked like Farley Granger⁽⁴⁾, the way he had his hair slicked back
And she said 'Well honey I've always been a sucker for a fella in a cowboy hat.

And just how far do you think you might be going?
He said 'Honey that would all depend on what you mean'
Cause you see eh, I'm only stopping here cause I got to get myself some of this gasoline'
'And I guess you should say I'm going thataway, why just as long as it's paved
And I guess you'd say I'm on my way to Burma-Shave'

And he said: 'Honey why don't you put your knees up on the glove compartment just like that'
She took out her barrettes, and man her hair spilled out just like rootbeer
And she popped her gum and she arched her back
And she said: 'Marysville⁽¹⁾ don't amount to nothing
it's just a wide spot in the road
and some nights my heart pounds like thunder
I don't know why it don't explode
If you ask me buddy, everyone in this stinking town has got one foot in the grave
I'd rather take my chances with you, take me all the way to Burma-Shave'

And he said: Honey, nothing to it. Cause you see eh... Presley's⁽⁵⁾ what I go by,
why don't you change the stations
Let's count the grain elevators as they go by in the rearview mirror'
Cause anyway you point this thing,
it's got to beat the hell out of the sting⁽⁶⁾
Cause every night I go to bed and I lie down all my dreams
and they die here every mornin'
So comon Presley, drill me a hole with a barber pole⁽⁷⁾
Cause I'm jumping my parole just like a fugitive tonight
And let's have another swig of that Black Velvet.
let's pass that car man if you're brave enough
So we can get there just before the sun comes up
Out in Burma-Shave '

Just you and me baby,
cause this town is driving me crazy
driving me crazy, I'm going crazy baby.
Vroooooooommmm, vrooooommmmmm.

Oh honey you know, I don't care what they say.
Go ahead and let them talk, yeah let them talk,
Cause tonight I'm gonna drive, I'm gonna drive baby
It's just you and me, it's just you and me baby.
Vroooooooommmm, vrooooommmmmm.

You see, the spider web cracked and the mustang I heard it scream
Someone said there was a wreck out on the highway.
I saw the smoke from the tires and the twisted machine
Well all you got is a nickel's worth of dreams,
and they've been swindled from you
when you're on your way to a place
called Burma-Shave

And the sun hit the derrick and cast a bat wing shadow
Up against the car door over on the shotgun side⁽⁸⁾
and baby when they pulled you from the wreck,
you still had on your shades.
But dreams are growing wild tonight,
just this side of a place I know...
called Burma Shave.

And over by the Foster Freeze, well they're closing up now...
Yeah, they're closing up... The waitress is going through her purse... There's only a few cars left... A truck rolls by... and there's another young girl, up against the Coke machine... with swizzle-stick legs, sucking on a Lucky Strike, and with a sign in her hand that says
"I'm On My Way To Burma Shave."

And it's a hot summer night.
And the fish are jumpin'. Fish are jumpin' and the cotton, the cotton is high... Your daddy's rich, your daddy's rich and your mamma's good-looking. She's so good-looking baby.

Vroooooooommmm, vrooooommmmmm.
So hush now, hush now. Hush now, don't you cry, don't you cry baby , don't you cry, don't you cry, don't you cry... don't you cry, don't you cry, don't you cry, don't you cry, don't you cry, don't you cry, don't you cry baby, don't you cry.
Don't you cry...

Written by: Tom Waits
No official release
(Transcribed by Pieter from Holland as published on Tom Waits Library, 2002)